Full Faith, Strong Confidence
Before conceiving Judah I battled terribly with fear, but God had already begun bringing me to new levels once I became pregnant with him, and so going through this has only refined me even more. He did not cause this, but He has brought goodness out of it, because He is the God of restoration. Right after my two week stay in the hospital, loving on our son once he was born and then having him die in my arms, I battled a lot with, "How else should I have prayed/I must not have had enough faith/I didn't use my authority over my body and my son's body correctly/etc." I still have to fight those thoughts . Even after this happened, I had a very hard time even praying for others, because my prayers hadn't seemed to work anymore. The son that we prayed and believed for had only lived for 40 minutes. I remember in the middle of the night, not long after we came home from the hospital, Bryan was sick in the bathroom. I remember starting to pray for him and then th...